room reading

You know what’s hard? Being a mom. Being a parent.

As someone who has a keen sense of self-awareness I also, not surprisingly, have a high EQ. I find this quality to be advantageous even though it feeds into my anxiety. I can read a room. I can sniff out dishonesty, like “liar, liar!” dishonesty but also I can see the real story of a person, their insecurities, if they really are “ok” when they say they are…those things. I think I can put people to ease. I like that about myself. It’s my super power.

Have you ever took the Strengths Finders test? You should go buy the book and do the test. It’s an excellent tool. You answer a hefty series of questions. And in the end, based on how you answer what seems to be random and odd questions, it will pop out your top 5 strengths. The idea is, we should focus on what we are good at rather than trying to make ourselves good at something we are not. And if you read more into it, you’ll find the same is encouraged when raising children. We should help them build the skills they already have by nature instead of forcing skills that they do not have. Debunking the pressure of straight A’s. I like the concept. It makes sense. 

My Five?

Relator. Strategic. Learner. Activator. Responsibility.

All of these are spot on. Especially my number one. Relator.

I thrive in these areas, no doubt. My anxiety even feeds off of some of them BUT they’ve help me build a successful career and meaningful relationships.

You know what I can’t do? I can’t get my daughter to tell me her worries in the moment. This bugs me. My Relator Super Power cannot breach her armor. I have to exercise patience with her emotions and THAT is not a skill I possess.

Not at all.

Not even a little bit.

She was not herself the other night. I asked a few gentle questions and I got sullen one word answers. This is the opposite of my girl. I knew something was troubling her. And I dislike that she will hold it in for days before confiding. I will leave it alone for now. All I can do is ask, reassure her that whatever it is that’s bugging her I can help her try figure it out. Toss out a few extra hugs. And worry.

Being a mom is heavy sometimes. Full of opposing emotions. Worry.




3 thoughts on “room reading

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  1. Yes. Worry is a huge part of parenting. My son is 19 and it’s worse now. At least when he was little I could protect him from most things. Not now. Now i have to trust that every thing we taught him is in there and he will make good choices. Worry and trust..two things I struggle with! 😉
    Hugs to you.

    Liked by 1 person

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