I’m a happy person. Even though I have mental health challenges I still categorize myself as happy. I feel happiness every day. The amount of happiness can vary. But it is there. I’m a person who likes to laugh and make people laugh. I could walk on the heels of laughter all day.
Anxiety, for me, kicks in high gear right as I lay down in bed. It’s a nightly occurrence. Severity ranges and rarely is it absent. I hate it.
I am trying to be friends with it. Accept it. Acknowledge it.
But it’s hard.
I am friendly but not a friend. I love my children but we are not friends. Hopefully, if I raise them well, we will be friends when they are older. But we are not friends now. All parents have influence over their children. Fathers, step-fathers, mothers, step-mothers, significant others. Whomever is in their life is influencing them. But I think the mother has the greatest influence. If she is present or not. Being friends isn’t our job. It isn’t my job.
He is just six years old but he’s lived quite the adventure thus far. He is a tenacious child with a magnanimous smile. He is sensitive to the world around him. He worries. He has a thirst for knowledge and an excellent vocabulary. He’s practical and creative. He will pull you in and captivate you. He has been challenging me since 20 weeks gestation. One day I will chronical our journey. Just not today. Today I need to write about him and his falls.
I love the 1950s. Less all the racism, male privilege, inequality and the threat of communism. You know, other than that, I LOVE THE FIFTIES! My house is sprinkled with Mid-Century modern flair and my closest has more than a few dresses reminiscent of the time.
Architecture, design and apparel.
I am not the prettiest girl you’ll meet. And I’m ok with that.
Growing up I dubbed myself the funny one.
Growing up we think outward beauty is the rule, not the exception. As we age we learn that it is in fact the exception, not the rule. I have an uncommon combination of rather unique features. And a half lazy eye. So there’s that.
Goal setting is important for personal growth. Some goals can take years of work to manifest and others can take mere days or weeks. Goals don’t have to be big. They can be itty bitty goals. Sometimes, it’s the smallest change that makes the biggest difference. Like getting up an hour early to achieve the goal of a calm rush free morning. And sometimes we create goals in order to establish good habits. And THAT is the premise for my ME Goals. I am looking to reprogram by brain and establish good habits.
I like Sunday dinner. I think it’s important. I think all dinners are important but especially Sunday dinner. As previously noted (here), I am on the Co-Parent Team. Family dinner each night is shared. But, on Sunday, nearly every Sunday, the kids are home for dinner.
You can read about the books here.
This is my favorite note.
This is the note that splits my emotional atoms in two; he is both here and not. I am happy to have the note but sad to not have him. This is also the note that reminds me how important words of praise are to our children. Genuine words. Not a reply to a child’s prompt. But a praise that comes out of nowhere. Those are the ones that stick with us. I need to do more of that.