Listen to Hear

Communication. The saver of lives. The killer of relationships. We listen to reply. We do not listen to hear.

Communication, or lack thereof, is a heavy hammer. Sometimes it’s a swing and a miss.

As our digital age progresses, face to face communication seems to be fading away. We seem to find bravery behind the screen and spout off in ways we would and could never do face to face. Being in front of a face makes you consider your reply more carefully. It makes you see the person. See their emotions. See their hurt and their vulnerabilities. But only if you look. Sometimes.

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ducks in a row

My mind has been calm. This is a beautiful thing. But also begs me to question why. Are the ducks in a row, the stars aligned? It is genuine and everlasting? It is providing a false sense of security? It is because I’m just having a bout of goodness or it is because I’ve changed my diet? Is it because the sun is out and the days are longer leading me to believe there really is more time in the day? Continue reading “ducks in a row”

Sixty Seconds Worth of Distance Run

Have you ever read the poem IF by Kipling? You should. It is powerful. My brother shared it with me during a difficult time many years ago and I have read it countless times. A copy hangs on my fridge and at my desk at work. It’s malleable; applying to a myriad of challenges. It is motivational. And positive.

If you can fill the unforgiving minute,  With sixty seconds worth of distance run. 

That is how I’ve felt as of late. I’ve been filling a lot of unforgiving minutes. I’ve not made time to write because life seems busier for some reason. And I’m making a lot of adjustments. My routine is being redesigned and I’ve not found the space where writing fits in.

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I am the victor.

The light may have dimmed but it was never snuffed out. Today is my birthday. My Happy New Year. As I reflect on 35 years this morning, in a house quiet and lit by the sunrise, I can only be grateful that the light stayed within me. Buried deep at times, but never snuffed. I was always hopeful. I always had faith in myself. I had hope. I knew one day it would come together. I feel like it has. I never gave up. I never let it win. I have fought hard for my happiness. Sparing with the darkness, the sadness. A joust, that at times, felt never ending. But I’ve won. I am the victor.

Give yourself a chance. Have faith in your ability to machete through the thick brush of sadness. Fight for yourself, fight for your light. Protect it. Nurture it. Love it. It will grow. And that light will cast a shadow onto the sadness. It will outshine your past. Be your victor.

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what is happening inside Sommer?

Fun fact.

“The majority of the body’s serotonin, between 80-90%, can be found in the gastrointestinal tract. It is thought that serotonin can affect mood and social behavior, appetite and digestion, sleep, memory and sexual desire and function.”

How is your digestion? Mine is awful. In fact, I have had IBS for 20 years. When I learned this fun fact in recent weeks I was both happy and pissed. I was happy because of hope. I was pissed that I wasn’t gifted this information earlier in life. My serotonin doesn’t have a chance. Making it quite the challenge to maintain happiness. Joy going right down the shitter.

Continue reading “what is happening inside Sommer?”

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