Why not start running?

I’m 37. I started running. In May.

Why?

Because I needed to do something. I know my mental health intimately. We are super bestie good friends. At the end of April I started thinking about June. Why June? Because that would have been our first due date. If you’re new here, you can check out our IVF Story. Continue reading “Why not start running?”

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Make a decision. And do it.

I made our wedding album today. My goal was to make it before our August Anniversary. Our 3rd Anniversary. I uploaded over 900 photos. Which, in itself, was an exercise of patience. It took nearly an entire day.

This morning I decided to just start it, make a few pages. A few pages turned into 34 pages. I was feeling creative, feeling joy reliving the memories. As I finished chunks I would want to share my excitement, I’d call over my husband and kids to look at my progress. Then I finished! I was literally doing a jig around the living and dining room.

Continue reading “Make a decision. And do it.”

how to stop negative thinking

Negative self-talk. It’s a killer. I know I’ve been struggling lately. It happens when I put my focus on what I’m NOT doing or achieving. The change in diet has been emotional. And I am feeling like I’m constantly failing. That’s because I’m not attaining perfect execution day in and day out. I put a lot of pressure on myself to reach perfection in my endeavors. And I always fall short. And I’m always hard on myself. But I am working on it.
Continue reading “how to stop negative thinking”

Sixty Seconds Worth of Distance Run

Have you ever read the poem IF by Kipling? You should. It is powerful. My brother shared it with me during a difficult time many years ago and I have read it countless times. A copy hangs on my fridge and at my desk at work. It’s malleable; applying to a myriad of challenges. It is motivational. And positive.

If you can fill the unforgiving minute,  With sixty seconds worth of distance run. 

That is how I’ve felt as of late. I’ve been filling a lot of unforgiving minutes. I’ve not made time to write because life seems busier for some reason. And I’m making a lot of adjustments. My routine is being redesigned and I’ve not found the space where writing fits in.

Continue reading “Sixty Seconds Worth of Distance Run”

what is happening inside Sommer?

Fun fact.

“The majority of the body’s serotonin, between 80-90%, can be found in the gastrointestinal tract. It is thought that serotonin can affect mood and social behavior, appetite and digestion, sleep, memory and sexual desire and function.”

How is your digestion? Mine is awful. In fact, I have had IBS for 20 years. When I learned this fun fact in recent weeks I was both happy and pissed. I was happy because of hope. I was pissed that I wasn’t gifted this information earlier in life. My serotonin doesn’t have a chance. Making it quite the challenge to maintain happiness. Joy going right down the shitter.

Continue reading “what is happening inside Sommer?”

remove “should” from your vocabulary

I do love the feeling of accomplishment after procrastination. I do produce good work at the last minute. Go me. But I suffer when I procrastinate in other areas of my life. Like, putting off going to the doctor. Or putting off self-care. Or putting off relationships and connections.

“I should meditate”

“I should call and make the appointment”

“I should go for a walk”

“I should reach out to so-and-so”

Continue reading “remove “should” from your vocabulary”

healthy body

I had my fitness assessment with the trainer. I was nervous. Which is silly but let’s be real. I have a fear of the unknown <queue anxiety>. So there’s that. I’m not judging myself for the nervousness I felt. Right now. I totally did in the moment. But I’m not ruminating. So, it s win!

It took about 45 minutes. Blood pressure, heart rate, skin fold fat percentage thingy then a step test, sit-up test, squat and push-up test. I was totally judging myself after the step test. I had to keep pace with this horrendous beeping sound for 3 minutes. After about a minute and half I thought I was about to gaze into the eyes of unconsciousness. After the 3 minutes we sat and she measured my heart rate again. The room was so quiet and I was painfully aware of my gasping breath. I tried to catch it but failed miserably.

Continue reading “healthy body”

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